NRA "R" US

A few months back I purchased a hunting vest at the Cabela's store in Post Falls Idaho. I am not a hunter, but the vest with its many pockets and sturdy construction has proved excellent for loading with measuring devices, notebooks, camera etc. for my work.

Last week I received an official looking piece of mail from the NRA applauding me for my patriotism and support of unlimited weapon ownership. The letter included an official looking membership card and a survey to be completed with my membership form and submission of $35.00 annual dues.

The letter named enemies of gun ownership including Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, Charles Schumer and Diane Feinstein. It then went on to tout the NRA's non-partisan position.

Let's be very clear here. I am completely opposed to everything that the NRA stands for. I have no intention of joining their miserable throng or in any way supporting the continued growth of gun violence in the USA.

Nevertheless one can't help but be tempted by the many benefits touted in their letter:

"By joining NRA you will also receive hundreds of dollars worth of benefits":

1. Your subscription to your choice of NRA Magazines: (cool titles come to mind: Blowing Shit up for Fun!, Survival in Post Apocalyptic America, Protect Yourself from Your Own Family, etc.)

2. Your personalized membership card (see above) and member decal (I could put the decal on the tailgate of my Ford 150 next to my American Flag and Harley decals!)

3. $1000 worth of insurance coverage for your firearms (will this cover me if my Saturday night special explodes removing my face?)

4. $5000 worth of insurance coverage for You ( will this cover me if I blow off a family member's face?)

5. Up to 60% off on Starkey hearing products (Is this because of my age or use of guns without ear protection?)

6. Free admission to NRA gun shows etc. (Oh boy!)

7. Lastly, and this almost did it for me - an Official Heavy Duty NRA tote bag! The author goes on to state "I know you'll use it with pride -- as a symbol of your history-making commitment to FREEDOM that few Americans can match." (I couldn't make this stuff up!)